Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Why We Suck

After my ongoing theme of doppelgangers, how better to round things up than with a face-to-face with Denis Leary (aka Doppelganger #1). I saw that the man had a signing for his new book, Why We Suck, not far from me. The only challenge was getting there. I had to take my Dad to the airport after a splendid little stay with me - and could hardly let family take a taxi in order for me to spend 30 seconds with someone who looks a little like me. That's just weird. Oh yeah - and heartless.

So I took Dad to the airport, saw him through check-in and waved him off towards an invigorating cavity search (or whatever LAX security has in store these days) and only then raced off to the signing. Luck was on my side, traffic was thin and I arrived with time to buy a copy and rush upstairs to stand in line. Phew.

I had visions of Denis seeing me and going "Jesus, it's like staring into a mirror! I simply MUST put you in an episode of Rescue Me as my long lost, shorter, younger brother! Please tell me you're an actor - you ARE an actor, right? Wait, who's your agent...?"

In reality, it was more like "And this is to you?" He gestures to the book. I confirm it is, indeed, for me. I manage to cough up, in a thin whispery voice (what the hell?!) that not a day goes by I don't get told I look like him. "Ah," he says. (clearly he doesn't see the resemblance) "Well there's a picture in the book of me and Willem Dafoe". I laugh. The nice lady takes my picture and I leave, grinning like a child.

Good to meet the man. Seems like a nice guy. I am sure the book is not. Nice. With a cover blurb that runs "A feel good guide to staying fat, loud, lazy and stupid" you know he's not gonna pull any punches. It looks like a good bitch about people who bitch about things and blame others when they really need to stfu and change themselves. Just my cup of tea!

So what if I don't have a recurring role on the new season of Rescue Me. I got my face-to-face and that's what counts. I do feel a little bad that I had no time to explain that I was a little clammy cos I'd rushed like a loon from the airport, the warddrobe synchronicity was purely coincidence and I don't normally wear blue eyeshadow and eyeliner - that was from today's audition for the part of a washed-up Eighties rocker.

So what.

I'm sure, deep down, Denis knew I was a fellow thesp, deeply immersed in the craft, too committed to waste time with superficial things like mid-day cleansing, when there was an actor to support.


Denis Leary thinks I'm just another creepy sweaty guy who wears makeup and stands too close.



  1. *looks at picture* hmmm... I still don't really see it. haha. That seriously was a stoke of luck to catch Leary after the horror that is LAX. I heard about his book a few weeks ago actually. Leary's comedy has always made me laugh, and I know his book will do the same. It makes me happy to know that I am not the only one who makes fun of society. ;) I must read that book when I get the chance.

    Wouldn't that be something if Leary offered you a role on Rescue Me though? If only jobs were that easy to obtain. ;) Glad you got to meet doppelganger #1. XP As for what he thought of you... who knows. I am going to go for thought number one myself.

    Random bit of info: I started a Voice Over comparison for Balthier... And thus far, you are winning: Gid~7; Hirata-sama~5 (someone put down both. >.<) I will always keep an eye on that, but for now you are named "Voice-Over Master!" Congrats! (Very rarely do people prefer an English dub to the original Japanese recording. Good job Gid!)

    Well. Off to the Doctor. Take care Gid!
    - Bree

  2. I think my very favorite part of this story is that you were wearing blue eyeshadow and eyeliner.

  3. I can always count on this blog to give me a great laugh and a fresh bit of insight on life, Gideon. I just spent the better part of an otherwise boring two hours at work going through all the entries I hadn't yet read. Just wanted to let you know that I love your writing style, and thanks for a good chuckle or two! :)

    - Jamie McGregor
    Ontario, Canada

  4. Leary was too in awe of your manliness to comment on the eyeshadow.


    That's it!


  5. Blue eyeshadow. *giggle* I'm sure you pull that of fabulously. ;) When is your appearance on "Eleventh Hour?" I thought it was this Thursday but, the guide says otherwise. I am keeping a close eye on that. XP
    *sits for an hour to work up the courage to ask the question she has been meaning to ask* hmm... (where to begin?) Our Performing Arts department is considered the lower-middle class of the school and, with that being said, we need a lot of help for our upcoming show. I am also trying to see if a few companies and conservatory schools will sponsor us by buying an ad in our program. If anyone could help we would be forever grateful. ^_^ If not, we understand but it was worth asking. I put up all the info about it here.

    If I don't get the chance to say it at a later time: Merry Christmas Gid! ^_^ (Ten days early I know.)